In this materialistic world, there are a million and one things that can be used to show love. It can be the latest iPhone or that golf club that your man really wants. Although these gifts will send the message home, you’re probably better off with these precious everyday gifts. Not only do these acts show that you really love your man but they also give something back to you: a relationship infused with more trust and friendship and a deeper sense of togetherness.
So go ahead and buy him a toy if you feel like it. But if you want to make him so happy he skips right past "Thanks, hon" to "I'm in love with the woman of my dreams," give him one of these tokens of devotion. No credit card required!
1. Give Him Your Attention (Even When the Subject Seems Less Than Pressing)
We live in a world where different gadgets and applications are constantly fighting for our attention. Don’t make your man also fight for your attention. When you have a conversation with someone and you give them your undivided attention, they get the feeling that they are important. Your man wants to feel important and valued in your life.
You also have to realize that, unlike women, men cannot multitask. If a man tries to cook and text at the same time, chances are that either the food will be trash or the text will be full of typos or even sent to the wrong person. The male brain filters stimuli to focus on one action. If he is concentrating on you while you are busy doing other things, he will feel like he is not a priority to you. Especially if this happens over and over again. Show your man some love by giving him attention.
2. Give Him Some "Guy Time" or “Alone Time”
"Men get energy from being away," says JoAnn Magdoff, Ph.D., a New York psychotherapist. Let him have fun with his boys or let him have some space. In a relationship, especially a long one it is often easy to forget who you are and adopt certain characteristics of the other person. This can be intimidating. Alone time allows each person to recharge and continue having the drive that the relationship requires. Let him have some time with his boys and they can have fun and he will even have something funny to tell you the next morning.
3. Give Him What He Wants (Before He Knows He Wants It)
It's easy to make your man disproportionately happy by replacing the box of cookies before it is empty or refilling his cup of coffee. Your man now knows you are tuning in to his needs, and making the discovery of them a priority. This is very important when he is stressed and such simple acts show that you are there for him. When you are attending an event or going out, put on that dress he says you look good in. Give him the pleasure of that arousal before he even asks for it!
And of course, anticipating his needs also obviously applies to the bedroom. But if "give him sex before he has to ask for it" sounds too much like advice your mom would give, try looking at it this way: Being pursued reminds your man of when he was single and actually got hit on fairly regularly. And when he's feeling that manly and attractive, there's no telling what he'll want to do to you.
4. Give Him Your Admiration
A lot has changed over the last 40 years, but one thing remains the same: Your guy's self-esteem is tied up in how well he handles the job of being a "real man" — his performance at work, in bed, as a dad. Stay mum about these subjects and it won't matter if he's a superstud with a six-figure salary. He'll... wonder.
"Men are still trying to get their mothers' approval, and you represent that feminine approval," says psychologist Gratch. So give freely, and give often, making sure you keep your praise genuine and, well, masculine. (Sad to say, complimenting him on his sensitivity will please him because it pleases you, but it won't massage him in those little-boy spots that most need the rub.) And remember to focus the compliment on him. If he gets a promotion, for example, instead of saying, "Great, we can use the extra money," try, "Wow, they finally see how hard you've been working.
5. Give Him His Adulthood
You can lecture him about his McDonald's habit and stock the kitchen with fresh fruit. You can count out loud the number of cocktails he has with dinner. But you can't — repeat, can't — make him take care of himself, drive more carefully or work out his relationship with his parents. He will handle those things when he decides to. Too much input makes him feel guilty and harped on — and will probably backfire.
"Mother him and he'll act like a child," says Gratch. "You give a great gift to a man when you stop trying to control his irresponsible behavior. He's got to learn from his own mistakes."
You also give a great gift to your marriage, because the risks of playing mommy are insidious: You'll slip from being equals to being parent and child, and that makes it awfully hard for you to respect him and for him not to resent you. (Of course, if the problem is serious — he's drinking or gambling too much, taking drugs, or seriously risking his health — you must decide for yourself what you will and won't live with.)
6. Give Him His Dreams
If he tells you that someday — not tomorrow, not next month — he'd really like to hike the Appalachian Trail, try biting your tongue before you say, "Uh-huh. And who's going to take care of the kids while you're gone?" We all need dreams. With days that are packed with demanding jobs, exuberant children, and circles of friends and family, life at this stage of the game is rich and rewarding. But it also leaves little room for real adventure. Dreams connect us to a past that felt limitless and promise a future that's a bit freer.
"Just try to make your interactions more positive than negative," says author Love. "It may be honest that you can't afford his dream, or that it's impractical or unrealistic. But the bigger truth is, do you want to be connected and supportive, or do you want to be the one who rains on his parade?"
Be the sunshine, Love advises. If you are, you can rest assured that he'll do his best to keep you warm too.
7. Give Him the Remote
Handing over the remote might be simple, but it's kind of a big deal to your guy. A night of binge-watching whatever he wants with you cuddled up by his side? That's hard to beat.
"Nothing says 'I love you' like giving your man a sense of control," says Susan Winter, relationship expert, and best-selling author. "Imagine the thrill he'll feel as he settles into the comfy part of the sofa to watch the show he wants to watch. You've just benevolently given him a gift he'll cherish."
8. Give Him a Delicious Meal
After a long day of work, you and your man are probably more drawn to the takeout menu than the kitchen. But the next time you're home first, surprise him with a special dinner. The quickest way to a man's heart is through his stomach, after all.
"Powerful, independent career women rarely have time to cook for themselves, let alone someone else — but it's one of the best ways to say 'I love you and care about you,'" Winter says. "If you don't have culinary prowess, don't worry: Make an attempt to serve him something he likes, and present it with your own special touch. Even if that's just a sandwich and chips!"
9. Give Him the Gift of Silence
Sometimes you don't have to say anything at all to say 'I love you.' Having a relaxing night without talking about annoying bosses and bills is a great way to show you care — and a much-needed stress reliever.
"Give your partner at the gift of simply having some silence," Winter says. "Allowing his mind to clear without all that extra noise will make him feel like he's in heaven. Men need to decompress, and the kindest thing you can do is to give him some room to chill."
I hope you have learnt a thing or two from this post. If you have any questions or comments about this post, feel free to post them in the comment section below and I’ll get back as soon as I can. Share this post and spread the gospel. Cheers!
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